Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (NIV)

On his dairy farm in southern Missouri my great-grandfather cut down black walnut trees to fashion furniture, some of which I use today. Over time and across the miles, my hutch and bedroom set have started to split in some places. A bit of Old English furniture polish helps the surface shine, but long-term neglect has compromised the integrity of the wood. Religiously applied, a little linseed oil does the trick.

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It’s not that I don’t have the time. You can make time for anything when you’re committed. And I could easily set reminders on my calendar. But the application of linseed oil requires a well-ventilated room. It requires time to apply it, time to let it dry.

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It requires just enough effort for me to keep kicking the process down the road.

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Bitterness, like the brittleness of antiques, does not crop up overnight. It takes years to break down the integrity of the believer.

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“Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God,” Paul, the champion of peace and unity, pleads in his letter to the Ephesians (Eph. 4:30). “Get rid of all bitterness” (Eph. 4:31).

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Bitterness. It starts as anger. Neglected, anger burns into rage. In its wake, ashes of bitterness drift.

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It’s not that we don’t have the time to deal with our anger. It’s not that we lack resources. But dealing with our anger takes just enough effort for us to keep kicking it down the road.

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Until we’ve nothing left to kick but ash.

Except that Jesus has forgiven us. He’s forgiven us for our “bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice” (Eph. 4:31).

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We are free. Free to “be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other,” (Eph. 4:32).

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Just as he forgave us.

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Linseed oil preserves old furniture, but even well-kept antiques fall apart. Anyone can commit to doing better, choosing kindness over bitterness. But even good intentions fall short. Only Jesus can free us to love one another as he has loved us.

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His kindness, his compassion - they are our inheritance, gifts of his Holy Spirit. And though we do not earn them, we can hone them as craftsmen hone their skills. The application of his Word. The time it takes to pray. Over time and across the miles, these practices can help us keep our frustrations in check and keep bitterness at bay.

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And may our forgiveness of others, and of ourselves, be the legacy we pass down to future generations. As a testimony to God’s faithfulness in our lives and of his great love.

Thank you, dear Jesus, for taking our broken hearts and fashioning us into our true selves: forgiven people free to love our brothers, our sisters, our enemies, and ourselves with the kindness and compassion of Christ. Help us to keep surrendering what hinders that kind of holy love and help us to love as you do. We pray for peace and unity, and for the Body of Christ to be strong together. In your holy name I pray, amen.