Timothy, I thank God for you—the God I serve with a clear conscience, just as my ancestors did. Night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. I long to see you again, for I remember your tears as we parted. And I will be filled with joy when we are together again. (NIV)

What's your first thought when you hear the word intimacy? In a conversation with a friend a while ago, I threw this word out to refer to a friendship, talking about the idea of having intimacy within that relationship. She said this idea struck her as strange, though, because so often we associate the word intimacy with sex.  

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This tracks completely for our cultural moment: Movies and television seem to rarely portray deep friendship alone anymore, but often show a progression from friendship to sexual intimacy as the natural next step. In so much of our culture's entertainment media, this is the story: sexual intimacy is the only way a relationship can deepen.  

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But what if we understood the idea of intimacy - closeness - as so much more than sexual? God is a God who exists in community himself (Gen. 1:26, for example), and as his image-bearers, we also were made to live in interconnected, dependent, authentic – intimate – community. Our Father wants intimacy for all his children, both with him (spiritual intimacy) and with other people (relational intimacy). You were made to love God, and you were made to love others (Matt. 22:37-40).

Despite remaining unmarried, the apostle Paul is a beautiful example of how to live a life of relational intimacy. Our world today would ask how a person could experience intimacy without being sexually active. But Paul’s life reveals that he experienced intimacy of relationship through a truer source: the unifying power of the Holy Spirit in the body of Christ.  

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Even as he was isolated in prison, separated from those he cared about, Paul knew that, in Christ, we all have the same Spirit uniting us. In 1 Thessalonians 2:17, he says that although he's been apart from those he loves for a time, he has not been apart from them in spirit for a second! In Christ, we are one! And in today's passage, which comes at the beginning of a letter to his mentee in the faith, Timothy, he reveals three ways we can shift our understanding of what Christ-centered relational intimacy looks like, to begin experiencing it with those God has put in our lives.

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1. Night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Prayer breeds intimacy! When we open ourselves up to pray for and with others, we are fostering spiritual and relational intimacy. How might you be able to open yourself up to praying with others in a more authentic way this week?  

2. I long to see you again, for I remember your tears as we parted. Emotional displays aren't just for girls, y'all. What if we weren't so busy self-protecting our image and egos that we allowed ourselves to feel and openly express our emotional realities among other believers? How might God be challenging you to be more vulnerable this week?  

3. And I will be filled with joy when we are together again. Praise God, intimacy isn't just about being emotional! Do you allow yourself to experience joy and celebration with other believers too? Sharing joy, fun, and celebration also foster intimacy, so how might you intentionally infuse some joy into your week with the people you love?

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And at the end of it all, remember why we would put in the vulnerable heart work to grow in this way... Because intimacy breeds unity. When a church community lacks vulnerability and closeness within itself, its unity suffers. But when we are opening up to one another, living in community, and practicing the spiritual disciplines, not just alone, but also corporately, we will see relational intimacy blossoming and unity growing - to the praise of His glory!

Father God, renew our minds by the power of your Spirit! Thank you for designing me to love others. Please show me how you want me to pursue relational intimacy with others this week and give me the courage to follow your leading with vulnerability and trust. In Jesus' name, amen!