The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. (NIV)

Confession time...and I'm not going to sugar-coat it...

I'm not a fan of giving up my rights for another. Here's the honest truth: I'd much rather take care of myself than serve someone else. If left to my own devices, I'm much quicker to look out for number one than I am to self-sacrificially serve, love, or care for another. This fear - because, to be clear, that's the driving force behind such self-centeredness - has gotten me in trouble in motherhood, marriage, and friendship because this self-protecting posture doesn't reflect the way God has designed us to live in community with one another.  

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However, although this self-focused tendency was once part of my sin nature, I am a new creation in Christ! I have a new nature that calls for sacrificial love, generosity, and submission to others. And even though that old nature doesn't suit me well anymore, sometimes I do forget and put it back on anyway (Eph. 4:22-24). Maybe you've been there too.  

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But I have a Father who tenderly teaches me to loosen my grip on the steering wheel of my life in favor of submitting and serving others. He wants me to trust that he takes care of me. He teaches me as any good teacher would: by example. Just as "Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Eph. 5:25), just as he "did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped" (Phil. 2:6), so Jesus calls me to relinquish my rights in favor of serving and loving others without worrying about myself. It will be okay, he promises, you weren't designed to self-protect. You were made to love others.

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We see this truth surface in today's verse from 1 Corinthians 7. In the midst of a whole section on how to relate to one another as believers in ways that honor God and reflect our relationship with Jesus, Paul sets up a startling dynamic for Christian marriages in verse 4: "The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife."  

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It's a dynamic entirely upside-down from what the world preaches, a message of self-care and protection. Take care of yourself. You do you. Treat yourself. Look out for number one. Instead, Scripture teaches us to give up our rights for the sake of love for another, for the sake of trusting and honoring the one we're in relationship with, and ultimately for the sake of the gospel - the radical love-in-action a marriage is supposed to symbolize (Eph. 5:31-32).

This kind of mutual submission isn't restrictive; it's an opportunity to display the glory of the One in whose image we were made. When we submit our rights to autonomy and authority within the marriage relationship, we are living out the submission of Christ. Rather than grab at what he was due - complete honor and reverence - Jesus entrusted himself to God, the one who judges justly, and submitted himself to a brutal, criminal's death on a cross for our good - to bring us back into right relationship with our Creator (1 Pet. 2:21-25).  

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What if, instead of seeing submission as "giving in," we saw it as an opportunity to live out the example of Christ in our daily lives this week? How might you love differently? How might you set aside self-protection and risk something to honor another? And, a step further, how might submitting in our earthly relationships help us learn to submit more fully to God's authority over our lives too?

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When the world preaches self-protection, we can instead practice submission. Not because we're certain of the other person's reciprocity, but because we are confident in God's care and Christ's call on our lives, to live as those made in his image, made to love others.

Dear Lord, thank you for your example of what loving those around me truly looks like. God, I confess it's often a struggle to love in the ways you've called me to, but would you strengthen me by your Spirit right now? Teach me to trust you in my relationships so that I can imitate you in how I submit and serve. In Jesus' name, amen.